


you don't have to say you love me.

by starletscarlet



Series: lineage in error. [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Angst, F/F, OR IS IT, One Shot, One-Sided Attraction, Original Character(s), Pining, but she's gonna keep simping, juliet deserves better
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-10
Updated: 2020-07-10
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:00:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25172776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starletscarlet/pseuds/starletscarlet
Summary: in juliet's eyes, there would never be anyone as perfect as luna.
Relationships: Juliet Aldean/Luna Tanaka, Landon Maloret/Luna Tanaka (mentioned)
Series: lineage in error. [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1823605
Kudos: 2





	you don't have to say you love me.

Juliet thinks that if there were ever an example of human perfection, it would undoubtedly be Luna.

It's a thought that crosses her mind often. How could it not, when she spends almost every second at her side? They head to school together in the early mornings, and Juliet may be half asleep, but she can still appreciate the pink sheen of a fresh coat of lip gloss— _always_ the sweetest strawberry, she would know—on pouty lips. Juliet can never help stealing a glance, or two, or way more, whenever she has the chance. What she wouldn't give just to kiss her, again and again...

There's just something about the warm brown of her doe eyes, too, framed by long, dark lashes that Juliet opined didn't really need mascara, even if she insisted on wearing it. The way they'd shine so brightly when they caught the light, or on the rare occasions that the smog lifted from Washington's skies. It was especially evident when Luna was happy, too, though Juliet would admit that had a bittersweet catch to it. She knew Luna like the back of her hand by now, and she knew that nothing—no streak of good luck, no first place trophy—made her happier than Landon Maloret. Try as she might, nothing Juliet herself did could ever compare to Landon simply _existing_. She couldn't help but envy him. There was nothing Juliet wouldn't do for Luna. She'd give her life for her, take a life for her, without hesitation. Meanwhile, Landon could like just one of her pictures or compliment her outfit and Luna would be in a lovestruck daze for the rest of the week, tripping over herself just to see him again. 

It stung; more honestly, it _hurt_. But Juliet could never blame her. She knew the feeling of all consuming love, knew what it was like to have just the smallest gesture leave her feeling like she would be in heaven for the rest of her days. Still, she found she could hate Landon with just as much intensity as she loved Luna. It was his fault, all his fault, for making Luna love him. He had so little to offer; he was nowhere near as attractive as Luna and Dabria made him out to be, he had the same personality as every other brainless teenage boy at Michaude, and Juliet knew he'd never care for Luna in the same way she could. Juliet never liked to entertain the idea of a relationship between the two, but she knew it would never last long. When push came to shove, when Landon inevitably tired of the _overwhelming_ commitment of a freshman year relationship, he'd leave.

And when he did, Juliet would be there for Luna, a shoulder to cry on and a gentle voice to reassure her that he'd never deserved her anyways, that she was so much more beautiful, so much more precious, so much better than the way he'd treated her. Nobody deserved her if they weren't going to treat her as such.

Maybe, in time, Juliet could get Luna to see that she would. 

* * *

The dance studio is one of Juliet's favorite places to be, if not her most favorite.

She wouldn't say Luna is _entirely_ the reason why. It's always nice to be there, even on the rare occasions that Luna isn't. The studio is like a second home to her, the powder pink walls of the dance rooms familiar and comforting. It's easy to forget about whatever's been stressing her out when she's distracted by trying to perfect her pointe technique, or helping teach another contemporary combo to the Junior Company classes. She's got other friends who make class enjoyable, too; she finds that partner work isn't as awkward if Joey's the one she has to do a pas de deux with, and judging by the amount of corrections they both get, she and Lacey are more or less competing to see who's the worst at acro at this point. 

But Juliet wonders if she'd be able to stand being at the studio so much if Luna wasn't there too. Even she isn't always a fan of hours upon hours in class, either trying to fix technique issues she's had forever or running through a new number to compete, but Luna's presence makes it that much more bearable. It's easier to keep from crying after Miss Maria yells at her for the third time that hour about how it shouldn't be _that_ hard to keep her legs straightened when Luna's there to roll her eyes the second their teacher turns her back, whispering a comment with a hushed laugh about how she's the last person who should be talking, considering she's so old she can't even walk straight herself. And as good of duet partners as Joey and Lacey are to her, nothing ever quite compares to the duets she gets with Luna. There's something that feels so natural, so _right_ , about dancing at her side. It's never awkward in the slightest, but something she can just let herself sink into rather than making herself get used to it.

It's on one of these occasions, while running a lyrical duet for an upcoming competition in January, that Juliet thinks she could do this for the rest of her life, really. They turn in perfect sync with one another, going through each movement as though connected from the inside out, and Juliet feels nothing short of at ease. Just the two of them and whatever music there is, on and on, until she can forget that there was ever anything else.

But compared to the dreamy fantasies Juliet creates inside her mind, reality never fails to disappoint. For the music always stops, and class always comes to an end, and it's back to the dressing room before heading home for the night.

To see Luna head back into the dressing room so nonchalantly afterwards, Juliet thinks that maybe she over-romanticizes everything. It's a habit that she can't help but cling to, when there's so little left for her otherwise. 

She also can't help but to stare after Luna, watching her glide effortlessly— _she really does over-romanticize everything_ —over to get her bag together, pulling chestnut curls out of a tight bun and letting them fall around her shoulders. Juliet's eyes stay trained on her as she fumbles around for her own things, always mesmerized, until she sees Luna pull out the clothing she'd arrived in and begin to peel off the leotard that clung to her. It isn't as big of a deal as Juliet makes it out to be; they've changed in the same room thousands of times before, but she isn't trying to make it obvious for the dozens of other eyes in the room to see. Instead, she scrambles to undo her own platinum bun and get herself dressed, in such a hurry that she snaps her hair tie just trying to pull it from her head. _Of course_. That always happened to her.

By the time Juliet has finished, tossing the broken hair tie into the bottom of her bag to deal with later, Luna is already standing wordlessly next to her in wait, bag slung over one shoulder and all of her focus directed towards the screen of her phone. Juliet feels that familiar sharp pang in her heart; with a smile like that, she's undoubtedly talking to Landon. About what, Juliet both wants to and doesn't want to know. But Juliet knows by now that it's better off if she just doesn't ask. If it's that important, Luna would tell her of her own accord anyways. 

It takes Juliet zipping her own bag up for Luna to finally turn her attention back towards her, the glow on her features diminishing slightly. Juliet offers a grin that she hopes doesn't show just how much that pains her to notice, and, just as she'd hoped, Luna seems none the wiser.

"You ready?" Luna questions, her eyes briefly flickering back to where they had been before. "My mom's already outside."

Juliet nods, and they head for the door together. She considers making a comment; something about the duet, maybe the music, or what the costumes might look like, or to ask how well Luna thought they were going to place, but she decides against it just as soon as she opens her mouth to speak. Luna's attention, once again, is evidently elsewhere. 

* * *

Juliet likes it best when she gets to stay the night at Luna's, just the two of them. 

Sure, sleepovers with their other friends could be fun, sometimes. There was nothing wrong with spreading out on the carpet of Dabria's bedroom, streaming whatever obscure horror movie she'd insisted was a thousand times more interesting than anything that would be playing at the movie theater, or bopping out to music from whichever musical Rory had currently found herself obsessed with while getting ready to go to the mall. Granted, it wasn't always good times; Dabria and Luna were at each other's throats more often than not, and Juliet had never quite been able to stomach some of the more gory films they ended up seeing, and as nice as Rory was, Juliet could do without her casting a knowing look in her direction every single time Juliet and Luna were anywhere near each other.

( _Juliet had never worried much about being too obvious with her feelings until Rory had started to point it out, just last summer._

_They'd all been in Dabria's room, about to drive out to the lake. Juliet had somehow managed to lose her bathing suit top while packing, so she'd had to borrow one of Dabria's. It was uncomfortable, to say the least. Definitely not made for someone as small as her, no matter how tight she tried to tie it. Finally, she'd given up and asked Luna to help her out, and she had. It fit as well as it could, then, but Juliet still wasn't sure about it._

_"I'll just keep my shirt on over it, it's whatever." Juliet had shrugged, reaching over to grab the tank top she'd discarded a few moments ago._

_"Well, for what it's worth, it still looks really cute on you." Luna remarked, flouncing off to follow Dabria out to the car before Juliet even had time to respond. Maybe that was for the best, though, given the flush that came to Juliet's cheeks afterwards. Juliet felt a wave of panic hit her, the warmth she felt in her face indicating that it was probably obvious. She tried her best to bring her curls around her face as quickly as she could, just to disguise it._

_But either she hadn't been quick enough, or she'd been too quick to not seem suspicious. "You've got it bad, huh?" Rory snickered when the sound of Luna's footsteps had disappeared, and Juliet turned to look at her so rapidly she thought she might get whiplash._

_"Huh?"_

_"I'd drop it if I were you, Jules. She's basically already got a boyfriend; it's not gonna happen." Rory warned, before leaving Juliet standing alone in Dabria's bedroom._ )

It's easier on her to be around Luna when they're alone. She doesn't have to worry about stuff like that, doesn't have to worry about being called out if her gaze lingers too long or her cheeks turn pink. Things are different in that respect; she and Luna don't breathe a word to one another, much less anyone else, about whatever happens between them. It's their business alone, a secret kept so well that even those who keep it don't dare to let it past their lips. 

Sometimes, Juliet catches herself thinking of that secret a lot more than she ought to. She does enough thinking for the both of them, really. Loses her mind and her heart in reflecting on things that, for all anyone knows, have never truly happened. At times, it feels like even Luna's forgotten about it. Juliet doesn't know how she can act so normal, as though nothing has ever happened, after everything that has. Well, that isn't exactly true. Juliet has an inkling of why that might be, but she prefers not to think about it. Maybe it _is_ normal, and she's just making a big deal out of nothing. That's a much more preferable alternative to thinking that maybe Luna does think nothing of it after all, thinks nothing of her. Or maybe she regrets it, regrets going anywhere near Juliet and doesn't mention it because it's just that horrible to think about for her. 

Juliet struggles to push those thoughts into the back of her mind, because she doesn't want to think about any of that. Not right now. Not while she's still here.

It's much easier to push those thoughts into the back of her mind when she's tipped back onto the bed, the faint echoes of whatever movie they had on—she's pretty sure it was some kind of drama, but like that matters now—becoming nothingness when her senses are clouded by the scent of sugary vanilla and the sticky sweetness of strawberries.

The last thing Juliet wants to do is think right now, and so she doesn't. She sinks into the heady feeling of it all, submitting to the lithe figure atop her without question. She lets her hand tangle itself in chestnut curls and presses ever so gently into a kiss she thinks may bruise her lips from the sheer intensity coming from the other end.

She can't stand to pull apart for a split second, but she loves every minute of a soft hand trailing up her figure, reaching up into her sweater to cup a small breast. Luna's hands are cold, and it's enough to make Juliet inhale sharply, but she doesn't mind in the slightest. If anything, Juliet only tries to pull her closer. Just to be touched by her—she hopes it's never over. 

But just as soon as she thinks it, it is. The minutes had gone by like milliseconds, and Juliet, still dazed, is surprised to see that Luna's been able to catch her breath so quickly. 

Luna gingerly presses a finger to her own lips, raising an eyebrow. "...Peppermint, isn't it?" she asks.

The question takes Juliet a second to process, before thinking back to the lip balm she'd put on earlier. " _Oh._ Yeah, it is."

"It's good." Luna remarks as though she were speaking of nothing in particular. She leans in one more time, just for a second, before turning her attention back to some couple quarreling on the television screen. 

The thoughts Juliet had pushed away earlier begin to flood her mind yet again, though she tries to combat them with the occurrences of a few seconds ago. It doesn't matter if she still wants more, if she knows that chances are Luna will pretend it never happened like always, if Luna truly, genuinely loves her.

Juliet's happy enough as it is, to stay by her side and take what she can get. 


End file.
